Why do we try to suppress our feelings? We’re embarrassed to cry in front of others. We’re afraid to show anger. If we’re too happy, people think we’re weird or out of touch.
When did emotions become taboo?
Emotions hold power. It’s a power that can control us if we don’t control it. But, controlling your emotions doesn’t mean suppressing them.
Feel your feelings. Let them move through you and run their course. Get used to how they feel for you and how you respond and react. Of course, this would be the healthy way to manage emotions, and we certainly can’t have that!
Our society has censored real emotions. Boys aren’t supposed to cry. If someone seems too happy, they’re probably on drugs or mentally out of touch with reality. If a girl acts bold or sets boundaries, she’s a b*tch. If a child is excited and gets too loud, they are shushed, or even worse, drugged.
As long as we comply, as long as we conform to a middle of the road mundane existence, we’ll fit in and be accepted. So we all walk around with masks on pretending to feel something we’re not. Our emotions are muted. It’s like looking at life through a fogged up window.
Next time you feel angry, get angry. Find somewhere safe you can scream or punch a pillow (better yet, a punching bag). Stomp around the woods, go for a run. Let it flow through and then out.
Next time you feel sad, cry. Confide in a friend and just let the tears flow. Or, find a place of comfort (in nature, at home, in your car with an ice cream sundae) and just cry. Let it flow through and then out.
Next time you feel happy, smile, laugh, jump up and down, dance! Share it with others. Bless someone else with your happiness. Feel that happiness deep inside your heart. Hold on to it. Become familiar with it so you can draw on it again and feel comfortable with it when you get through a sad or angry time.
Learning to “deal with” emotions isn’t about hiding them from the world and ourselves. It’s about allowing them to be the part of us that they are. It’s about understanding how we react and respond to them, and being able to appreciate the lessons they have for us. Life is about experiencing all of it.
An excerpt from book #3 (coming in 2024):
“What do you feel right now, in this moment? How do you allow those feelings to show? When do you find yourself suppressing your feelings? Imagine if you shifted the focus from making others comfortable to allowing yourself to feel.”
Coming soon! Book 3 in the Life Management 101 series. Stay tuned for details and check out the first two books on Amazon while you’re waiting.